Man's Petty Nations
by Light Through The Veins
Summary: After a battle with Doctor Doofenshmirtz, Perry reflects on something his nemesis said. Post-AT2D. Oneshot.


The opaque darkness was littered with scores of tiny lights, infesting the ground below. Pittering and pattering, the rain dropped onto the scene like rays of sunshine bursting through window blinds in the early morning: gentle and smooth, yet with an odd intensity that could make one squint and avert his eyes. While the sun would be warm, however, the rain chilled the freezing air even further, nearly turning the still night of Danville into a subzero tundra.

From the rooftop of Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated, Perry could see for miles on end. But as he gazed down into the abyss below him, he was only concerned with one thing. One moment, earlier in the day…

* * *

><p>"<em>Don't you see, Perry the Platypus?"<em>

_The maniacal doctor dangled upside down from the cliffside, the sharp rocks jutting out beneath him. One of his legs was coiled with rope, held from the top of the precipice by a small platypus. Waves cascaded not an inch below his head. Perry looked down at him, his face vacant of all emotion. Doofenshmirtz grinned._

"_Don't you see?" He repeated. "You can't win! You'll never win! You could just drop this rope right now, and let me fall to my death." With a slight shift of his body weight, he gazed down. "But I gotta tell ya, it would not be a pretty way to go. Especially if I landed on one of those sharp rocks there. You know, back in Gimmelshtump, there were tons of stalactites all over the place… or are they stalagmites?… Anyway…"_

_Perry began to tune him out, and tied the rope he was holding to a sturdy, nearby tree. All he had to was let him hang there, and…_

"_See, this is what I mean!" The doctor's voice rang out from below. Perry finished tying the knot, and looked back over the edge to see Doofenshmirtz, who was strangely happier than usual. "This is exactly what I mean! You won't let me go, because you can't! You'd be lost without me. I, the crazy Drueselsteinien scientist, who you can't let go! You and I, Perry the Platypus… we're destined to do this forever!"_

_Perry glared down, and turned to leave._

"_And even if you did get rid of me…" He stopped. "It wouldn't make a difference! There will always be __evil__ in the world. If not me, then my daughter! If not my daughter, then… well, I don't know. You have those guys that always give ten percent tips, no matter how good the service is, and are always rude to the waiters- ya know, that is what's evil!_

"_The point is, Perry the Platypus, you can't win. No matter how many of your precious agents are out there on the streets, fighting nemeses like me. Evil will __always__ run rampant! Ha ha ha!"_

_Doofenshmirtz broke out into an evil cackle, which soon rose in volume to a full blown maniacal laugh. Perry thought nothing of it; he donned his jetpack, and flew away from the scene._

* * *

><p>Why then, was he thinking about it now?<p>

The rain continued to pelt his fur; he didn't mind it, being a semi-aquatic mammal. A little bit of wet here and there never hurt him. As he looked down on the streets of Danville through the torrent, he could see bright flashing lights. Red.

Not a moment later did he hear the sirens, blaring loudly. Was it a robbery? A murder? Perry couldn't help but wonder as he watched the police cars dart through the lanes, in hot pursuit of some criminal. _There will always be __evil__ in the world!_ He had half the mind to go down and find out what it was all about. Thunder cracked. Perry raised his eyes to the sky, noticing that the downpour was only growing in magnitude. Would it be so bad? Would it ruin him to go out on one unprecedented mission without consent of the agency, not dealing with his nemesis?

He could almost hear Major Monogram's voice ringing in his ears: _"Some things, Agent P, are meant for humans to handle. This agency's not for that."_ But at the same time, could he just sit back and let whatever evil was happening down there go by without helping? Why couldn't he fight for justice in more ways than one?

A gunshot shook him from his reverie. He had to get down. He had to help. They needed him-

"Perry?"

He froze. Where was that voice? Did he just hear-

"Perry?"

Looking down, he saw two small yellow blobs on the ground below. Quickly, he grabbed his binoculars. Sure enough, it was them; he could notice the triangular and F-shaped heads anywhere, even hidden under the raincoats they were wearing. Both had flashlights, and were scanning the streets. "Perry?" Phineas called out again, looking into the deep darkness.

Perry cursed himself. Here he was, planning on risking his life for some cheap thrill, while his owners were out, looking for him. How late was it, anyway? How long had he been gone? He'd lost track of the time after having dispatched Doofenshmirtz, spending the next hours mulling the words he had given in his head.

The sirens continued to blare. The kids continued to search.

"Ugh, it's hopeless, Ferb," Phineas said dejectedly. "We've been searching for hours! And we've only searched half of Danville!" Ferb showed him a piece of paper, which Phineas shone his light on. It was a map, and Ferb was pointing at a few specific places. "Hmm… You're right! He might be in the sewers! Platypi love dark and damp places, right? That might be where Perry went!" Ferb placed a comforting hand on his stepbrother's shoulder. "Yeah, I know we'll find him. We just need to keep searching!"

An aggravated purr sounded from behind them. They turned their heads simultaneously, quickly dispatching either's thoughts that they were just hearing things. Both shining their lights at the source of the noise, they gasped in elation. "Perry!" Phineas rushed to the monotreme, scooping him up instantly. He held him close to his chest, with Ferb joining him shortly after, joining in on the embrace. Perry remained wall-eyed and seemingly oblivious. "Oh Perry, we were searching everywhere for you! We were so worried!" Perry looked up and chattered again. "I know you usually disappear for awhile each day, but with this storm coming in, we couldn't be too careful." Another crack of thunder, this time coupled with a flash of lightning almost directly overhead. "Speaking of this storm, we should probably start going home."

They began to walk back. Perry couldn't hear the sirens anymore.

_Let man's petty nations tear themselves apart…_

* * *

><p>"…And then we built an underground race car track!" Phineas explained, changing into his pajamas as Ferb crawled into his bed.<p>

Though his eyes were blank and unfocused, Perry, seated comfortably on the foot of Phineas's bed, was listening intently to all that the boy was telling him. He couldn't wait to see it for himself in his secret lair, where he could watch all that they had done. That factor of the lair really came in handy, he remembered, when they had that battle with all the evil robots from the alternate dimension.

Perry suddenly grew solemn. How he wanted the boys to remember what they had done on that day! They'd even called it the "Best Day Ever", but now, they couldn't even recall what had happened.

Phineas looked down at the platypus, noticing his change in demeanor. "Hey, what's wrong, little buddy? Am I boring you?" Perry did the only thing he could in that situation. Another chatter. Phineas smiled.

"You're right. It _is _time to get to bed!" He turned off the light, and could already hear Ferb softly snoozing. With a happy grunt, Phineas leapt onto his bed, sending Perry soaring up into the air. Phineas deftly caught him, pulling him close. "I love you, Perry. I'm so glad we found you." Perry's thought process slowed. He could only think about how Phineas had saved his life from one of the Normbots, and how he had jumped into his arms afterwards. Risking all, risking everything…

Phineas felt a slight tingle in the back of his head, almost like a déjà vu sense. He ignored it, continuing to embrace his friend. But when he moved to pull away from Perry, he couldn't. It was almost as if- no, it couldn't be. Was Perry hugging him back? He could almost feel the furry little arms wrapped around his torso. He pulled away, successfully this time. Looking down into the platypus's eyes, he saw nothing had changed. "Perry…?"

Perry merely chattered; lowly this time, so as not to wake Ferb. Phineas tried to make sense of it all. Why was he feeling so…?

"Come on, buddy," Phineas said, hoisting Perry up and putting him underneath the covers next to him. "You can sleep with me tonight." He held the platypus tightly in his arms, petting his fur gently with one hand. Perry smiled in the darkness, content to have this one moment with his owner, united in happiness.

_My land's only borders lie around my heart._


End file.
